Talking with kids about circumcision

Whether you’ve left your boys intact or had them circumcised (or did some of each), or only had girls, I want to ask you how you have dealt with the subject of circumcision? Have your children ever asked you what it means to be circumcised? Have your children seen both circumcised and intact boys, and if so, have they commented on the difference? Or if your children are too young, what do you plan on telling them if they ask why they were circumcised or

My boys are intact, but some of their cousins are circumcised. They’ve taken baths together, and so far my boys haven’t asked me why their cousin’s penis looks different from theirs, but I’m anticipating the day that it comes, and I want to be forewarned and forearmed. I feel rather like the mother of a child who doesn’t believe in Santa Claus, fearing that he will spoil the fun for all the other kids who still believe. Part of me wants to talk about it in strong terms, but part of me is afraid that in so doing, I will make my sons feel somehow superior, or that they will “spill the beans” to their cut cousins who will then be mad at their mothers, and I just don’t want to get into that, y’know? Of course, that may not happen; and my kids may never even bring it up, but still…

Over the past few days, I’ve been reading and watching more about circumcision (just watched the “Penn & Teller” video on it — warning that it has foul language and lots of penis wisecracks in it, but it was interesting), so the topic is on my mind. Some of the comments on these blogs and videos have been from men who are violently angry that they were circumcised as infants; others were circumcised as older children or even adults and are angry over it (with the men, it was usually because they were misled into thinking that circumcision was better than being intact, was necessary or was the only option for some condition they had, and they were dismayed over the outcome, and/or discovered too late that there were much milder treatments that the doctor never told them about). Reading comments like these made me proud and that I had “stuck to my guns” and kept our sons intact, and I want them to be glad but not at the expense of their cousins, y’know? And I don’t want my boys to tell their cousins, “Your penis looks weird because your mom had part of it cut off!” and then to have the cousins ask their moms about it. I’m hoping that the conversation never comes up, but I want to be prepared in case it does.

The biggest problem I foresee is that my older son has interminable questions and always wants to know “why.” And I anticipate that every answer I give him is going to be followed up with “why?” until it makes me uncomfortable. My hope is that if the question comes sooner rather than later, I may just say, “Your cousins are circumcised; that means that this part of their penis was cut off when they were babies.” And if they ask why, I will respond, “Because their parents thought it was the right thing to do; but we think that it was right to keep you whole.” If the question comes up later (or never) when they’re too old to spill the beans in a “Santa Claus isn’t real” fashion, I may just show them a video of a baby being circumcised, and say that I didn’t want to do that to them. How old they are at the time will be the determining factor of how much I say.

In the Penn & Teller video, they interview a pregnant woman and her husband who were trying to decide whether to circumcise their son or not. The husband was intact and didn’t want to cut his son, but the woman was for circumcision. It seemed to me that she was bowing to the cultural norm, rather than having any independent reason for circumcision; and actually her husband’s experience of being ridiculed for being intact weighed heavily on her desire to cut her son. She said with tears once, “I just want to do what is best for him,” and related that she didn’t want her son to undergo the teasing and tormenting that her husband endured as a teenager or young adult. The husband was very upset by being teased, but not enough to get himself circumcised (although there have been some men and older boys who have gone that route). I don’t anticipate my sons being teased for being whole, and I certainly don’t want them teasing anyone else for being cut; but I don’t want them ever to have misgivings about not having been circumcised as infants. So, I want them to be reasonably proud [not exactly the right word] and grateful [again, not really the right word] that they were not put through circumcision as infants, which means that eventually I will want to tell them my strongest thoughts and feelings on the matter, so that if anything comes up in a negative way, that they will not be caught off-guard, but can deflect any criticism (without being mean or critical in return).

Just in writing this, I foresee that at some point my kids will ask what circumcision is (reading through the Bible, you can’t exactly miss it), so I plan to give a simple and accurate answer as to not only what it is, but why God ordained it for Abraham’s offspring, and why it is not incumbent on Christians, and leave it at that. Maybe around the age of puberty (unless it comes up before), I will tell them that some boys are cut and others are intact, so they may see boys that look different from them, and just not to say anything (especially to their cousins); and also around the time of puberty (maybe before if necessary, or if I think they can handle it; or later, if they still seem to young at that time), I will give them a more thorough explanation, perhaps including a graphic video of a baby being circumcised.

What do you think?


31 Responses

  1. I think it is great that you are anticipating any questions that may arise. Here is a post by a circumcised father who put together a slide show for his intact son: “A father’s talk with his son about infant circumcision”

    • Oh, thank you for posting this link! I had read it before, but couldn’t remember where. It was what was on my mind when I was writing about hoping my sons would be glad I had protected them from circumcision. Now I have it saved to my bookmarks, so will be able to have it for future reference. 🙂

  2. I have both and they haven’t asked anything yet. Or maybe it has come up once now that I think of it but it didn’t develop into a discussion yet. My oldest is 12 though so I am anticipating questions as well soon. I have my info ready and I will make sure my grandkids are not circumcised.

  3. A book for boys was recently recommended to me. It has a section on circumcision, which was described as superb; it is What’s Happening to My Body? Book for Boys by Lynda Madaras. A very important consideration is that your boys understand the harm of circumcision, and are not mislead when they have children of their own.

  4. When my intact son and his circumcised cousin were pre-school age (there is a difference of two years in age between them), they were taking a bath together. The older cousin noticed a difference and said, “I like your penis.” My son said in reply, “I like your penis too.” Then they went on playing with the toys in the tub.

    They were both very accepting of one another, and I think adults could learn a lesson from what they said to one another.

  5. I love the respect you’re showing for both intact and circumcised boys (who couldn’t protect themselves from a traumatic experience). Before my grandson, Matthew, went to kindergarten, I explained to him that children can be very cruel to one another and I was teased because I wore glasses, the children called me “Four Eyes.” I was devastated! Then I said, “Some men have told me they were teased for being intact when everyone else was circumcised. But, Matthew, you know how lucky you are to have your whole body, and anyone teases you is simply ignorant about what the foreskin is or jealous because you still have yours.” “Don’t worry, Nana,” Matthew said, “I won’t tease them back; they’ve been hurt enough already.” When he was a teen, I gave Matthew Lynda Madaras’ book that Jim mentioned above. She’s done a wonderful job in describing individual differences with respect and care! I think explaining to your sons that we’re moving from a circumcising society to a non-circumcising society, so we’re going to see both types of penises until circumcision comes to an end. In the meantime, we need to help our children learn to respect individual differences and one another. And, to end on a light note, one five-year-old, when he learned what circumcision is, said to his mother, “I’m glad you didn’t let them cut that part off me, it’s the part that tickles the best!”

  6. Oh my goodness, Kathy, what a huge topic to delve into! But a necessary one, though, and I appreciate your willingness to explore this issue with respect and grace. My 6 year old son is circumcised. If we ever have more boys, they will most certainly be intact. I haven’t a clue how to address the possible questions that could arise from our son, if that happens. As it stands right now, I don’t have any idea how to talk to him about why his penis looks that way. But I’m thinking I’ll just leave that issue alone for the moment and address it if he asks. My husband is also circumcised, but is learning more about the intact penis and is fully supportive of leaving future sons intact.

    Thanks again and all the previous commenters offered great insight and advice.

    • This reminds me that one of my friends circ’d her oldest son but then opted not to circ her other sons (although her younger children were with a different husband). I’m not sure of her reasoning why to circ in the first place, but presume that it was “like father, like son,” and/or “that’s what everybody does.” I also don’t know why there was any discussion when she had her younger children about doing things differently (and assume her 2nd husband is circ’d also), but it may have had something to do with her giving birth at home, and then having to deliberately make an appt for a circumcision, rather than just having it done before leaving the hospital.

      I feel certain that her older son noticed the difference, but haven’t talked with her about any conversations she had with them about it. Note to self to do that next time I see her…

  7. I have two grown sons. We circumcised the oldest so that he would look like his dad; by the time we had our second, we decided that looking like dad wasn’t a good enough reason. When the oldest asked me about the different appearance of his brother’s penis, I answered as best I could (“at the time we thought this was best; kids look different in lots of ways; some have freckles, curly hair, ”etc.) The oldest burst into tears and wanted to know why I did “that” to him. Fast forward to adulthood. My daughter-in-law told me that she and my oldest son would probably circumcise their son. But when I changed my grandson’s first diaper, I was delighted to see that he was intact. My daughter-in-law said that she left it up to my (circumcised) son. He researched the subject and decided that there was not a good reason to do it. So I feel good about the decision not to circumcise my second son and very proud of my oldest son’s informed choice for his own son.

  8. My sons are 10 and 11. We talked about circumcision pretty early. Their Dad is circumcised and they used to say, when they saw him naked in the shower or in the bathroom, ‘Oh. Sorry about your penis Dad. I guess your parents didn’t now better.”

    My husband would say, “It’s ok, I’ve never known different!”

    I think talking to kids about ridicule and bullying in general terms will be enough so that they know never to shame anyone for what they look like. We all need to have respect for differences.

  9. Just be careful about using the word “whole” to describe an uncircumcised person. It could be offensive to some people.

    For example, you would not say, “That child is an amputee, this child is ‘whole’.” The word has an implication that is not very nice. Perhaps a word like “uncircumcised” would be a better choice.

  10. Actually the world intact is most often used. The word whole also reflects what the normal state is. Uncircumcised indicates that circumcised is the norm and that is a fallacy.
    In your example of amputee, we assume the amputation was a necessity. If it was done by choice for no medical reason, the other child would indeed be whole. We have to name it what it is.

  11. . . There is a movement of Jews who are questioning circumcision, and working to end this abuse of children. The movement ranges from the Orthodox to the secular, and includes mothers, fathers, scholars, historians, medical professionals, activists, and intellectuals.

    Jewish Groups for Genital Integrity

    * Jews Against Circumcision

    * Brit Shalom Celebrants by Mark D. Reiss, M.D.

    * Questioning Circumcision: A Jewish Perspective by Ron Goldman, Ph.D.

    * The Current Judaic Movement to End Circumcision: Part 1

    The Kindest Un-Cut Feminism, Judaism, and My Son’s Foreskin by Professor Michael S. Kimmel

    Jewish Intactivist Miriam Pollack has some great commentary on Foreskin Man in this recent interview.

    Jews Speak Out in Favor of Banning Circumcision on Minors .

  12. Mothers need to keep a completely open dialog with their sons about this, but do not show any vids of a boy being circed. This would be over the top! Teach him that either way is fine and be open and honest with him. Too many women dont talk openly with their sons about such things.

    • Alice, You are EXACTLY right ! Too many mothers are not totaly open when discussing topics such as this. Boys will talk with their mother about things that they will not with anyone else. From day one be totaly honest and open and never veer from the truth. Even older boys need counseling from mom about sex. Circumcision should be his choice and if he chooses it, support him in every way, many boys will want it.

      [Actually, most boys and men who are left intact will choose to remain intact when given the choice. Most men are very attached to their penis, and like it fine just the way it is.] — Kathy

  13. Of course its a different time where the rates are lower. But i asked my parents when i was 11 to get circumcised and at the age of 14 was. I circumcised my 2 sons.

    So why? Talking with my wife, we had our 2 sons done by a plastic surgeon so that the best result was done. A clean cut with the most sensitive parts left, coupled with an aesthetic look.

    I did have UTIs and tore the frenulum playing sports with a protective cup. The embarrassment was wilting. Also, as a plus before my DW a British exchange student thought that my circumcised penis was the sexiest thing in the world. Having her talk about it soo openly really made me feel sexy!

    Again stick with your guns, and follow your heart. Its the best way for parenting.

    • Your story actually serves to strengthen my belief that the boy’s penis and any alterations made to it (except for certain medical necessity) should belong to the boy and not to his parents. Your parents chose to keep you intact, but you eventually wished to be circumcised so you made that choice. But if your sons eventually wish that they had been left intact and had a foreskin, they have no real choice to do so. Sure, they can try artificial foreskin restoration but it won’t be what they were born with, though it can be a tolerable approximation. You took that choice from them, when you took their foreskin.

      I understand you felt like you made the best decision for them, based on your experience, but you don’t know that they would have the same experience you did. After all, most men in the world are intact and generally do not choose to be circumcised except for religious reasons. [BTW, Ben Affleck was circumcised as an adult after a frenulum accident, when his doctor convinced him it was the right/best thing to do, but did not fully inform him of what circumcision would entail; he is furious at what he lost.] And I can point you to frank articles from women who found the intact penis to be “the sexiest thing in the world”, and/or that the circumcised penis was “weird” or “strange-looking”. Sometimes people find a circumcised penis to be unusual in a good way, or in a bad way; and the same thing can be said for the intact penis. But I would never surgically alter any part of my children’s bodies just to hopefully fit somebody’s else’s ideal.

  14. Well as a young intact man, now 25 I can give you my experience.
    I once asked my parents (I was about 7 or so) and they told me what it was, and that people used to do it (during and post war) because of cleaning issues – no water in wars for washing. But that its less common now.
    I asked why I wasn’t done if my cousins were and mum said she talked to dad about doing my older brother and he said “yeah we should, I hate it when I stub my toes and they are hard to clean…lets cut them off too”
    Basically that was it, never needed to know more. No need to cut off toes cause they need washing, why snip the tip? Lol.

  15. This article is in many ways illogical and derogatory. The American Academy of Pediatrics says that the preventative health benefits of infant circumcision clearly outweigh the risks. Doctors’ evidence found circumcision decreased risk of urinary tract infections, some kinds of cancer, HPV, HIV, and other sexually transmitted diseases. To say that babies who have had a 1 min procedure that pediatricians agree saves lives and prevents disease are not “whole” people is incredibly insensitive and simply wrong. It also is derogatory against the many people that follow what is written in the Bible (Jews, Muslims, and many Christians). Uncircumsized males (that is the medical word for it) are “superior” in the same way that unvaccinated males are “superior” – superior at getting infected with something and then transmitting it to their spouse. Lets not kid ourselves. When age-old religion and modern science both agree on something, it is worth taking the time to really read the facts with an open mind before jumping on the latest fashion bandwagon.

    • Would you please provide a direct quote from the AAP that says the preventative health benefits of infant circumcision *clearly* outweigh the risks? Also, please provide a link to the studies of risk assessment they did when coming to their conclusion (hint, there are none — how can they know the benefits outweigh the risks, when they don’t even know what the risks are?), and also, provide a link to the studies they cited on the functions and benefits of the foreskin, when they decided it didn’t matter if it was cut off (another hint, they cited none — how can they know that circumcision does not cause harm to the boy by removing a functional organ, the foreskin, if they don’t even know what the foreskin does in the intact male?). Looking at some of the studies done on circumcision, yes, there is “evidence” that circumcising infants decreases UTIs, some kinds of cancer and some kinds of diseases — BUT NOT ALL STUDIES DONE ON CIRCUMCISION SHOW THIS “benefit” — just as many studies, perhaps even more, and these studies being of better/higher quality, demonstrate the opposite — either there is no benefit at all, or even greater risk. There have been studies done on males in the U.S. Navy, showing that men who are circumcised have a greater likelihood of being infected by one of those diseases you mentioned; the U.S. has the world’s highest rate of adult males who were circumcised for non-religious reasons, and the highest rate of heterosexually transmitted HIV.

      Here is a link to bookmarks on the subject for your perusal; please read more than just pro-circumcision stuff before you accuse others of being illogical.

      I would also question where you get the idea that modern medical circumcision takes only 1 minute to perform; perhaps the form of circumcision you have witnessed is less severe than what is practiced in American hospitals, but it generally takes far longer than one minute — more like 10-15 minutes at least.

      Pediatrician$ have rea$on$ for recommending that they get paid for performing circumci$ion$ — the AAP is a trade organization, who$e goal is to protect it$ own intere$t$, e$pecially financial one$. Their $tatement did not actually $ay that the benefit$ outweighed the ri$k$; they actually $aid that they $hould get paid by in$urance companie$ and government-provided health care for cutting off fore$kin$. One can imagine that the real rea$on$ they came out in $upport of circumci$ion had little to do with the evidence (indeed, most doctors in other countries, individually and as groups, have access to the same information that American doctors have, and do not support routine infant circumcision — in fact, many doctors in other countries are calling for the practice to be banned as a human rights violation), but more to do with their pocketbook$. When insurance companies and government organizations refuse to pay for circumcision, that causes parents to think about circumcision, and to refuse it in greater numbers. [Many doctors get paid $200-$2,000 for this procedure which you believe takes 1 minute; if they had enough babies lined up in the hospitals, that means they could earn $12,000-$120,000 in a single hour. “Cui bono?” — “who benefits?” And, “follow the money.”] After all, if the insurance company won’t pay for it because it is an unnecessary cosmetic surgery, then they begin to question whether it should be done at all. When they begin to question it, they actually do more research than just “it’s in the Bible” or “my husband and all my brothers are circumcised” or “it’s cleaner — isn’t it?” And when they do enough research, they find that it’s not cleaner, that modern medical circumcision is quite different from what was done in the Bible, that babies actually DIE from it (so much for it “saving lives”, perhaps, maybe, eventually, eighty years down the road), that some babies end up with the entire head of the penis cut off, etc., and start deciding to leave their babies whole.

      I bet that if you were properly restrained, I could chop off one of your fingers in less than one minute; you would then be missing one of your fingers, so would not have your “whole” body. Would you still consider it “incredibly insensitive and simply wrong” to say that having only 9 fingers is different from having all 10 fingers, just because the procedure took less than a minute?

      When Christians circumcise, they do so because of a failure to read and consider the *whole* Bible, especially Galatians, in which Paul declared that in light of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, circumcision was nothing more than mutilation, and if Christians had themselves circumcised for religious reasons, they were in fact cutting themselves off from Christ, and putting themselves back under the law. Muslims disregard the Bible, and Jews disregard the NT; both circumcise as a religious rite. When infants are circumcised in the hospital, that is NOT a religious rite. There is also much evidence both within the Bible itself (the root words and their meanings) and outside the Bible (the Jewish writings) which indicate that what is currently practiced as “circumcision” is NOT what was practiced in the Bible. [See here — the “brit milah” was the original circumcision, and removed only the actual *fore*skin — not the entire prepuce, but only the part that extended past the tip of the penis; the “laying bare the glans” (“periah”) was added in the second century after Christ, to keep Jewish boys from growing up and denying their Judaism or Jewish roots, by pulling forward the prepuce — most of which they retained after circumcision — and appearing as if they were intact.]

      I do agree with your final statement, that “it is worth taking the time to really read the facts with an open mind before jumping on the latest fashion bandwagon.” Most males in the world are intact; only about a third of males have had some or all of their prepuce removed, and most of them undergo the procedure as a religious ritual, and not for any supposed medical benefit. So at least two thirds of modern doctors and scientists agree that routine infant circumcision does NOT provide enough benefit to make it a recommended procedure. Most of the males in Europe and Asia and South America are intact; several years ago, medical organizations in Canada recently stopped recommending that males be circumcised, and the govt health care no longer covers it, leading to a dramatic reduction in routine infant circumcision in that country. In Africa and the Middle East, circumcision rates vary according to country, but are all done for religious reasons (primarily Islam and Judaism, but also for various cults and tribal religions, particularly in Africa). The U.S. alone is the only country in the world in which males are circumcised primarily for supposed medical reasons — reasons which are not found to be compelling in the rest of the modern world.

      • It’s also worth considering that for the healthcare industry in America (and it IS an industry – elswhere in the world, such as the UK for example, healthcare is provided by the government and is payed for by taxpayers. Therefore it is answerable to the people, whereas in America it is largely answerable to the shareholders, all of whom demand a healthy dividend from their investments), circumcision represents a win-win situation. The foreskin y’see, rather than merely being a ‘flap of skin that won’t be missed’ is in fact a double layered organ which provides protection for the head of the penis in pretty much the same way that your eyelids protect you from going blind. But the foreskin also contains cells called Fibroplasts and these can be a lucrative additional source of income for the American healthcare industry. Fibroplasts are grown from cultures from harvested foreskins. The resulting fibroplast cultures are used in the manufacture of medical products such as artificial skin used for treating burns and some skin ulcers, used in the production of beta blocker medication for people with heart disease, used in the production of high-value cosmetic face creams and moisturisers and, maybe most controversial of all, used by the cosmetics industry for testing new makeup products in lieu of testing on animals.
        All this means that foreskins are routinely sold on the open market by the healthcare industry to any company that wishes to buy them. Thus making it a win-win situation for the healthcare industry. Firstly, they charge the parents for carrying out the operation (WIN) and then they make a second profit from selling the amputated foreskin on to a third party (WIN again!). IT’S THEREFORE IN THEIR INTEREST TO CIRCUMCISE AS MANY BOYS AS POSSIBLE SO THAT THEY CAN REAP THE BENEFITS AND KEEP THE SHAREHOLDERS NICE AND HAPPY.
        In countries that have socialised healthcare systems, routine infant circumcision is virtually unheard of. This is because that the potentiai benefits (if any) are of so little consequence when compared to the cost of carrying out the procedure and the inherent rarity of problems caused by being left intact that routinely circumcising boys is a waste of taxpayers money. Are these nations that do not routinely circumcise boys riddled with millions of cases of complications, diseases and other consequences of leaving boys intact?
        I am intact, I have never had any problems with my penis.
        My brother is intact, he has never had any problems with his.
        My father is intact, he hasn’t either.
        In fact, all my male cousins, uncles, nephews, friends, work colleagues and other aquaintances are intact to the best of my knowledge and none of them have any problems either (and the women in their lives don’t have any problem with their men being intact either).

        Routine infant circumcision in America exists for one reason and one reason only – TO MAKE MONEY.

    • Having whole, complete genitals is not “the latest fashion bandwagon” but the human norm throughout aeons. “Medical” infant circumcision was only fashionable in the English-speaking world in the 20th century, and it fell right out of fashion again everywhere except the USA. (And they are almost the only Christians who do it, ignoring much of the Greek Scriptures [“New Testament”]). There were no epidemics of any of the things circumcison was supposed to be good against.

      The AAP’s claims are unsupported by the evidence, as a letter from 38 top European paediatricians – heads and spokespeople for the paediatric associations of of Austria, Britain, Denmark, England, Estonia, Finland, Germany, Iceland, Latvia, Lithuania, Norway, Sweden, and the Netherlands and senior paediatricians in
      Canada, the Czech Republic, France and Poland. – shows. (

      1-min procedure? You could chop off a hand in less than a second and the baby would not be whole. In fact if a circumcision takes only a minute, the doctor is going dangerously fast and certainly not allowing enough time for any pain-relief to take hold.

  16. I have a 3 year old uncircumcised boy. This morning in preschool, my son was pulling down his pants to go potty when a 4 year old boy walked in and said “he has a funny looking weenie” I said “that’s not nice” and asked him to give my son privacy while he used the toilet. I SO wasn’t ready for that and it caught me off guard. I wish I would have said something different but what I’m not sure. Any advice?

    • I think that was the right response. When my kids were little, they commented to me about their circumcised cousin’s penis; I didn’t want to get into a major discussion (and they specifically said that he had a “little” penis, not that his penis looked “weird”, but I think they were noticing the difference between circumcised and intact, rather than actual size), so I just said that just like people have different color of hair, eyes, and skin, boys’ penises can have different looks, and it’s not polite to comment on differences. That was that.

    • Your post made me laugh, in a good way. I’m not a woman, but it’s kinda funny, when I was in preschool, I was the only boy out of 9 boys in my class who was uncircumcised. It was over 20 years ago, so I’m sure much has changed since then. After I had finished going pee, one of the boys pointed at my peeper and said “hey, you don’t have one of those things ‘around'” (by ‘around’ I think he meant that little edge of foreskin left over that surrounds the base of the glans).
      It did feel kinda weird, because almost every boy at that school was cut, except I do remember one boy from another classroom at that school who had a foreskin, he was using our bathroom during outside time, and took a small square of toilet paper and touched the tip of his foreskin to the center of the tp making a small wet spot saying “look what I can do!” one of the other boys said “that’s stupid”
      Good Lord! the things you see as a little boy in preschool. LOL

    • Your post made me laugh, in a good way. I’m not a woman, but it’s kinda funny, when I was in preschool, I was the only boy out of 9 boys in my class who was uncircumcised. It was over 20 years ago, so I’m sure much has changed since then. After I had finished going pee, one of the boys pointed at my peeper and said “hey, you don’t have one of those things ‘around'” (by ‘around’ I think he meant that little edge of foreskin left over that surrounds the base of the glans).
      It did feel kinda weird, because almost every boy at that school was cut, except I do remember one boy from another classroom at that school who had a foreskin, he was using our bathroom during outside time, and took a small square of toilet paper and touched the tip of his foreskin to the center of the tp making a small wet spot saying “look what I can do!” one of the other boys said “that’s stupid”
      Good Lord! the things you see as a little boy in preschool. LOL

  17. become a show off, and be a magician, cover and un-cover the head at will.

    teach a boy to be proud of that natural sliding skin.

    you can’t do what i can- should be a good response.

    absolutely no need for shame, there is MUCH PRIDE IN A NATURAL penis.

    stop the chop .

  18. (I’m circumcised) – (And I am happy about it personally)

    My Story and recommendations:
    – When I was I’d say about 6 years old I was at a friends house and we were both changing together in the same room (we dint think twice of it because of our age) and we obviously saw each other’s penises briefly as we changed, and I saw his (uncircumcised penis) and was kinda puzzled because I’d always thought that my penis was how everyone’s penis is like. My dads penis was circumcised and so was my little brothers.
    Anyway after I briefly saw it i got dressed then asked if his dad’s penis was like that too, (Because I thought that he just had a different looking penis just because of his genes). And he said yes. Then he asked me the same thing and I replied yes my penis is like my dads and brothers. And that was that, we were friends for a long time then just grew apart. I never asked my parents what the deal was between what the difference was between my friends penis and mine.
    Later in life during SexEd at school I learned about the differences between circumcision and non circumcision in boys. And then I put it all together and was kind of surprised my parents don’t teach me that there are two different types of penises kind of thing in a mom lecture or something. I felt wired that I took me till about age 13 to know that my penis was circumcised and others are and some are not.
    Then over time I looked up more info on what circumcision is and why it’s done pros and cons kind of thing after the SexEd class because they don’t really cover it a whole lot.
    I am in a state where apparently 82% of males were circumcised at birth hospital records show.
    That’s my story and as a adult who wasn’t taught about circumcision until puberty I recommend that you tell your especially son(s) and daughter(s) too what circumcision is at about age 9-10!

  19. I think I’m gonna have the talk with my son soon. He seems to show more curiosity about it. He is uncut, and so is dh, however three of his cousins are cut, as are half of the boys in his preschool class, and most of the boys on the block who he plays with (but not all). We call his penis “his peeper”, which he goes along with, but somehow he calls a circumcised penis a “peep”. He said to me “Jaden has a peep, me and Kyle have a peeper.” When I asked what that means he said “Jaden’s peep and Ryan’s (cousin) peep looks like a circle; me and Kyle have a triangle”. I asked him how he knew; and he said “we go peepee potty same time, and we get to see our peep-peeps”. I felt a little taken aback for a second, but then I remembered back to when my two little brothers were always doing tandem peepees in the toilet and on trees which they did up until about 12. I definitely think it’s almost time to have the talk, because he clearly sees that there’s a difference, I hope dh will do it. I can only imagine how much more fun it will get when he learns to skin back his peeper.

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